Posted in Halloween, Life

How I Do Halloween

IMG_20191030_215741582

If you’ve met me or read this blog before, you probably know that my birthday is on Halloween because I like to tell people that. I love having a Halloween birthday. I love decorating my yard and dressing up in costume and carving pumpkins and watching scary movies and going to haunted houses and accidentally scaring myself with the tricks and traps I set for my husband.

This year, my homemade cemetery had a theme…

 

While I love having a birthday on Halloween and celebrating it all month, my actual birthday can be a bit chaotic. When the day approaches, friends often ask me, “What are you going to do for your birthday?” and I just laugh. If they’re thinking of parties and date nights and nice dinners or even just some relaxing me-time, they’re way off.

I dressed as Lucy Carlyle from the amazing Lockwood & Co series at school and a wild-haired demon thing wearing yoga pants at home…

See, I can’t actually go out on my birthday because I have to want to be home to hand out candy to all the trick-or-treaters I’ve been luring to my house for the past month. Nope. No fancy birthday dinners or relaxing me-time on my birthday. Instead, my night goes something like this:

  • Dump candy in bowl, light 8-10 jack-o-lanterns, turn on Halloween-themed music. Change out of work costume into yoga pants, comfy sweater, and creepy mask. Pour “pumpkin juice” into a Halloween-themed cup, and sit down to put my feet up and wait for—DING DONG! Never mind, trick-or-treaters are already here.
  • Open door, offer candy, say Happy Halloween in creepy voice, close door.
  • Sit down, take a sip of “pumpkin juice,” realize I cannot drink pumpkin juice through my mask, lift mask, raise “pumpkin juice” to lips—DING DONG—spill “pumpkin juice” on self.
  • Pull mask down, open door, offer candy, am informed of peanut allergy, offer Halloween pencil instead, say Happy Halloween in creepy voice, close door.
  • Sit down, pick up “pumpkin juice,” am handed birthday gift by hubby. Squeal with delight from behind my mask, begin opening birthday gift—DING DONG!
  • Put down “pumpkin juice,” leave gift half-unwrapped, open door, see some of my students on the doorstep, offer candy, say Take two. Take THREE if you’re a good student. Watch them squirm a bit, say Happy Halloween in creepy voice, listen to students laugh at me because I’m a very dorky teacher, close door, return to birthday gift.
  • Rip paper quickly and unceremoniously off of birthday gift, say Ooo! Thank you so much! in non-creepy voice. Lift mask to kiss hubby—DING DONG.
  • Pull mask down, open door, offer candy, am informed that neighbors have bigger candies, say Good for them in creepy, surly voice, close door.
  • Lift mask, realize I have lost my “pumpkin juice,” begin searching for it—DING DONG!
  • Pull mask down, open door, realize it is the pizza we ordered, take the pizza, tip the delivery person, offer candy, say Thank you and Happy Halloween in creepy voice, close door.
  • Find “pumpkin juice,” lift mask, guzzle “pumpkin juice,” stuff slice of pizza in mouth—DING DONG!
  • Swallow pizza, pull mask down, open door, see small child staring at mask in horror about to cry, lift mask, say It’s ok! in not-creepy voice, offer candy, say Happy Halloween in least-creepy voice, close door.
  • Sit down on couch and—DING DONG!—Tell hubby to please please please hand out candy for five minutes while I eat a slice of pizza.
  • Eat pizza, pour more “pumpkin juice,” contemplate going to Bermuda for my next birthday.

But, really, that would never happen. I love my Halloween birthday and all of the “work” that comes with it. This Halloween, like every other Halloween, I was right where I wanted to be.

***

If you’re wondering why I’m posting about Halloween halfway through November, it’s because this October brought with it the wrong kind of scare. On October 20th, an enormous tree fell on my parents’ house during the terrible storms in Dallas. My parents were inside at the time. They were (thankfully, miraculously) unharmed, but the house suffered serious damage.

IMG_20191021_105935600_HDR

I spent the week before Halloween helping my family clean up debris, deal with insurance, pack my parents’ belongings, and relocate them and their cats. It was exhausting, both physically and emotionally. This is the house I grew up in and also the house my dad grew up in. It’s never not been in our family, and its sentimental value is incalculable. After going through all that, I just wasn’t in the mood to write for a while.

Now though, things are starting to look up. Everyone is doing ok, and I’m finding my way back to the keyboard. There is still a long road ahead though. There’s a lot of work to be done, and my parents will be displaced for quite a while. If you would like to make a donation to help them pay for repairs, visit their GoFundMe page. A few dollars toward their goal would make a wonderful belated birthday present to me. =)

 

 

 

Posted in Life, Poetry, Reading, Teaching, Writing

News, Updates, and a Little Havoc

Hello! Happy Summer!

It’s the end of July, which means…

1) Going outside in Austin in the afternoon = recreating the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark.

2) The start of the new school year is close enough that it can no longer be ignored, so I’m desperately trying to finish all the books I’ve started this summer.

3) It’s time for some summer updates.

*

New Publications!

product_thumbnailThis summer, my work appeared in two new publications. You can read my humorous poem “Conquest or Coincidence” in this year’s issue of Best Austin Poetry, available at Lulu for only $1.75 + shipping. My poem, which is about the time my very fat childhood cat caught a mouse, is in good company with several poems from the talented and entertaining Diana Conces and many other gifted Texas poets.

IMG_20190710_094437535Also, I’m happy to report that my creepy flash fiction story “Window,” which was published at Havok in May, was selected for their season one anthology, Rebirth. Print and Kindle versions are both available on Amazon. The forty-eight very short stories in the collection range from scary and suspenseful to hilarious and thought-provoking. I recommend “The Devil Went Down to Costco” by Stephanie Scissom to make you laugh, “Words” by Katherine Vinson to make you think, and “If These Walls Could Talk” by J.L. Knight to give you shivers.

New Shopping Opportunities!

isla_280x280.25948040_fd2syi7nThis summer, I updated the Shop page of my blog, added new items to my Etsy store, and created a Teachers Pay Teachers page. Check them out and see if there’s something there with your name on it. (Psst! Want a super-secret coupon? From now until September 1, use the code JULYBLOG at my Etsy shop to get 15% off your purchase!)

New Cat!

Back in the fall, we quickly went from being a four-pet family to a two-pet family when my two cats, Gink and Toby, passed away within three weeks of each other. Toby was eighteen and Gink, who had been my familiar since he was a kitten, was almost twenty years old. Suffice to say, their passing left a deep chasm in my heart and my home. We still have our dog, Uno, and our other twenty-year-old cat, Gabby, and I love them both SO much, but I missed my boys. So, in May, hubby and I adopted an eighteen-year-old cat with a thyroid condition.

Everyone, meet Sneakers.

 

Somehow, this sweet, handsome, friendly, charismatic little guy spent TWELVE YEARS in a shelter in Pennsylvania. I still don’t understand how he went so long without finding his forever home, but I’m so glad his journey led him to us. (You can read more about his adoption story in this interview with Austin Pets Alive.)

Sneakers is more like a big kitten than a senior cat. He talks in his sleep and snores and plays with toys and gets the zoomies around 11pm. He eats like a pig (both in volume and manners) and tries to stick his paws in whatever we’re eating as well, whether it’s cereal or salad. He follows Gabby around the house singing to her (unfortunately, she is deaf and therefore immune to his siren call) and plays bongos on the dog’s ribs when he walks by too close. Sneakers is such a character, and we’re so happy to be his family.

Also, I’d just like to say that I never intended to adopt an older cat. All the elderly cats we’ve had in the past have been homegrown. In fact, I’d been hoping to get a kitten in the next year or so. But after adopting Sneakers, I have to say… old cats are awesome. Consider giving one a chance. Check out the available senior kitties at Austin Pets Alive or visit your city’s local shelter.

***

Well, that’s what’s new with me this summer. Writing, reading, weird trinkets, cats… the usual, really. What’s new with you?

 

Posted in Life, Random

If I Get Eaten By a Chupacabra, Give the Cat His Medicine

Nature gives us gifts every day. Today I’ve already had my share.

It’s summer, which means great bursts of laziness followed by great bursts of creativity, culminating in me keeping vampire hours. I’ve been staying up way too late the past week doing everything and nothing. It’s been great, but I’m determined to get back to a semi-normal schedule. So last night, I promised myself I’d be asleep by 11PM. I went to bed at 10:30. I read my book until 10:59 and turned the light out at 11:00 on the dot.

IMG_20190605_200918667
The great singer

At 11:15 on the dot, my cat Sneakers began to serenade me.

Ah, nature’s gifts…

It was beautiful really, with low notes and high trills, unexpected breaks and tempo changes. I’m sure some flirty feline out there would have been swept off her paws. Unfortunately, I am not the target audience for this tune, and, sadly, our female cat is deaf, so his song went unanswered, except by me yelling, “Sneakers!!! Kitty kitty kitty! SHUT UP!”

Suffice to say, I was awake until midnight.

As I drifted, finally, into dreamland, I thought, “I hope I can still get up by 7AM. I have things to do…” Then I fell asleep.

Until 4:45AM. When I woke up for no reason whatsoever. Like, REALLY awake. Like, I-have-a-new-idea-for-a-story-and-I-just-remembered-where-I-put-that-thing-I-couldn’t-find-yesterday-and-I-should-clean-out-my-closet-this-summer awake. I tried to ignore it, but there was no ignoring this level of alertness, so I made a few pages of notes for the story (it has potential) and decided to go for a walk.

IMG_20190627_055216764
The note I left for the hubby

That’s when the real gifts began. While I can appreciate a good cat serenade and a random wake-up call, it was this unexpected morning hour outdoors that I am really grateful for.

I heard doves cooing and saw the shadow of something that might have been a chupacabra but was probably a possum. I saw a roadrunner. I petted dogs and chatted with neighbors about their dogs. I watched the sky lighten so gently that I didn’t see it happen. One moment it was dark; then I turned a corner, and it was light. It felt so delicate, so sudden, that I wondered if I could make the darkness reappear by retracing my steps.

Roadrunners and possums and dogs are common sites in my neighborhood. That doesn’t make them any less delightful, but they don’t cause surprise. What did surprise me was the last gift the morning had to offer. Just before I got home, a pair of bald eagles flew over, low and graceful and… shocking. I didn’t know we had bald eagles in Austin. I’ve certainly never seen any. Before I could doubt myself and wonder if my mind was playing tricks, one of them turned and swooped by again, its large black body, wide wing span, bright white head and white tail. It flew to the top of a big live oak tree and perched for a few moments, sending a squirrel running for cover, before taking off again toward my house. By the time I made the block, both were gone.

IMG_20190627_065112094_HDR

I wouldn’t have seen these beautiful creatures if I hadn’t been nudged awake before sunrise. Their presence definitely felt like a gift.

Now it’s 8:30AM, and I’m yawning in front of my keyboard. I’ve had less than five hours of sleep, but it’s too late to go back to bed. Besides, I’m afraid of what other gifts I might miss.

***

[UPDATE: After doing a little research and talking to some friends, I think the birds I saw might have been caracaras, which look similar to bald eagles and are more common here. However, according to Texas Parks & Wildlife, we do have some bald eagles in Texas. Either way, they were really cool.]