Introducing: Morose Penguin Review

It’s that time of year. It’s cold. It’s dreary. People stopped giving you Christmas presents weeks ago. You’ve been forced to put on real clothes and go back to work, where no one is leaving prettily-wrapped homemade baked goods on your desk anymore. (What’s up with that?) You’ve just broken your first new year’s resolution, and the second one is only holding on by a thread. Plus, there’s something called “Blue Monday” looming on the horizon, which sounds like a cool new bar, but is actually just the name coined for the most depressing day of the year. As if anyone needed that added to the calendar.

In short, things are pretty gloomy.

Why not celebrate the gloom? Embrace it through art.

Last month, I posted my formula for naming a lit journal, and several of you shared your creative creations. The one that made me smile the most, however, was mine: Morose Penguin Review. I have to admit, I sort of fell in love with it. And if there’s a better publication for these gloomy late-January days, I don’t know what it is.

So here’s what I propose. Make yourself a nice cup of tea or pour yourself a double bourbon or open a five pound bag of gummy bears—whatever you indulge in, I don’t judge—and write some gloomy poetry. Because for one month (and one month only) I’m going to publish the Morose Penguin Review here on this blog.

Version 2
Bringing you gloomy poetry since 2018

Here are the guidelines. We’ll keep it simple.

Theme: Morose Penguins
Genres: Poetry
Deadline: January 31, 2018 (midnight CST)
How to Submit: Send one poem (any form, maximum 30 lines) and a two-sentence bio using the contact form on my website. I will read them all and publish the best. And possibly the worst.
Payment Upon Acceptance: Publication on my blog, a virtual pat on the head, and the satisfaction of knowing that you have lessened the gloom (or multiplied it, depending on your piece) of millions* of readers.
(* Actually, probably more like 100 readers.)
What I’m Looking For: Poems about morose penguins that make me laugh or smile or think or go “Aww…whoa.”

I realize this is a short turn-around time, but if we wait too long, winter will be over and no one will be gloomy anymore. Plus, if you get your submissions to me by the end of January, I can publish them in February which, let’s face it, is just a slog of twenty-eight blue Mondays in a row.

That’s it. Surprise me. Wow me. Make me laugh. Try not to traumatize me too terribly. Above all, have some fun and distract yourself from all the gloom. I look forward to seeing what you send me.

Published by Carie Juettner

Carie Juettner is a former middle school teacher and the author of The Ghostly Tales of New England, The Ghostly Tales of Austin, The Ghostly Tales of Burlington, and The Ghostly Tales of Dallas in the Spooky America series by Arcadia Publishing. Her poems and short stories have appeared in publications such as The Twin Bill, Nature Futures, and Daily Science Fiction. Carie lives in Richardson, Texas, with her husband and pets. She was born on Halloween, and her favorite color is purple.

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